Posted by Leonard DeRogatis, Ph.D. In our culture, cultural stereotypes paint men as being ever-ready to perform sexually anytime, anyplace, with anyone. Imagine the confusion and concern many women experience when their red-blooded American man is no longer interested in having sex with them.
Problems with low sexual desire appear to be more common among women than men. But males also experience episodes of low sexual desire that can last from days to months. The reasons for such episodes vary in men, just as they do in women.
Men may lose their desire for sex when they are stressed, depressed, or in conflict (particularly with their partners). Low testosterone levels may also result in significant reductions in desire. Sometimes certain medical conditions, such as high blood pressure, high cholesterol, and diabetes can interfere with sexual desire, which often will not return to normal levels until the primary disorder has been treated.
Many drugs, particularly antidepressants and antipsychotic medications, also interfere with sexual desire. Strong emotions like fear, anxiety, guilt, or anger will frequently blunt a man’s sex drive.
Aside from these reasons, a man may simply be disinterested in having sex. This is different from low desire that has a biological cause. Instead, it stems from a lack of motivation or interest in having sex with a specific partner.
Given all of the possible reasons for low sexual desire, how do you know which one is responsible for your male partner’s sudden lack of interest in sex? The best way to find out is to ask. Explain to him that sexual intimacy is very important to you.
Ask if there is something you can do or change to help him become more interested. Often, you will be pleasantly surprised. If the reason still eludes you or appears to be more complex, discussing the problem in a non-blaming way can be the first step to getting help.
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